Thursday, August 11, 2011

Etiquettes for Air Travellers

Still facing a drought of topics when I chanced upon one more set of etiquettes. Since there is a probability of air travel in the near future I will write here about etiquettes for air travellers, of the Indian variety:

Thou shalt not travel like you are shifting house. I know it's your holiday and you need a lot of bedding, pillows, badminton racquetts, extra food so that you don't starve. But please, please don't carry with you stoves, pails for water, chairs, and other paraphernalia. For goodness sake it is an aeroplane you are boarding not a ship crossing the seven seas.

Thou shalt arrive in time and only crowd around the airline counter when your flight is announced. Please read the thingammajig for the flight announcements, better still listen to the announcers. They are trained to entice you with their voice.

Thou shalt not try to jump the queue, anywhere. Please don't make a beeline for the airline counter saying you are late and need to catch this flight or you will die of cerebral hemorrhage. We are mortals and have been patiently waiting for our turn.

Though shalt not carry oversize bags in the cabin, because, most Indians travelling in economy class being obese these days a poor thin chap like me get perfectly obliterated. So, have mercy!

Thou shalt not bang the overhead bins open and shut as if it were your father's property. Have some consideration. Or, ask for help from the trained hawai sundaris (air beauties).

Thou shalt not wander about the aisle showing how macho you are. We know you are macho from the bulge in your pectorals and biceps, so don't block the aisle when people are boarding the flight and finding their seats.

There's more to come in the next installments.... So have patience.

I am @johnwriter on Twitter and John.Matthew on Facebook. I blog here.

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