Saturday, January 29, 2011

Standing Beside a Bad Salesman in Train

I am not a great admirer of short shirts. (A shirt which when worn looks like the man has borrowed it from his son. It gives a man a general sense of being poorly and inadequately attired.) So, what's the story?

Ahem. There was this short shirt standing beside me in train. What was worse was that the short shirt's midriff was bulging out like a huge jackfruit from below the short shirt and the jeans had descended to the nether regions of the hairy paunch and was hanging like a flag at half mast below. Phew! This short-shirt was making conversation on the cell phone. He is so close I could even hear the other party's conversation. His hand was on my chest and he was shifting about, all nervous energy.

"Sir, any time I see your number, I give you call, sir." What a lame excuse to call a person! God, some people! Naturally, anybody would be offended. Now, I hear every word he speaks because I am riled, I am steaming all over. Usually I am a very tolerant commuter. But this once I am so chagrined I could extricate my leg from among the profusion of limbs and kick him.

He is some kind of salesman. May be, he is selling insurance. But his clothes doesn't indicate even an iota of a business person.

"Patrose here, sir. How are you, sir? Family all well?"

I could guess the other party wasn't amenable to the conversation. Good. There is silence at the other end. He deserves it. God help him if he didn't know the called party's family personally. Naturally. What if he is unmarried? Divorced? Here was a man probably trying to enquire about the family about which he knew nothing. The conversation is doomed for sure.

"Er... er... thank you, sir," said the short-shirt and hung up, or whatever it is you do on the cellphone.

Then he starts a conversation with another person standing nearby. The conversation is in Malayalam. It takes all types, I guess. God's country has its characters. He produces his visiting card even before he is asked for one. He works in a bank and is selling home loans and is rather desperate about it. Bad, bad, bad salesmanship! May be, before that, he should read this article about phone conversations.

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